No bones about it, I get pissed when ministers quit and move on because of challenges. This is especially true when it comes to youth pastors quitting because of authority issues with their Lead Pastor. Challenges, especially personality challenges, are put there to shape our character, good or bad.
I work for a man, he’s not a deity, he’s not even that great of a man in fact his character is pretty lousy but I work FOR HIM. I’ve been at my current job for a month shy of 3 years. 3 tumultuous years. 3 humbling years. 3 frustrating years. We have a warehouse next door, there is a 2 inch dowel and countless used, empty boxes. More than once I have pictured my boss on a box and beat it into pieces with that dowel. Am I proud of that? I don’t know… but I do know it’s better than the alternative.
This morning, in a conversation with my mentor, he asked me if I felt I was doing a good job serving my boss. WOW. Gut check. Honestly, no. I haven’t tried to serve him in a very long time. It’s hasn’t been further from my mind. My mind is consumed by survival, as in, how am I going to get through this week??
I think in that moment I realized all the advise I have given to ministers about sticking it out, serving their authority and remembering it’s not about them, were a bunch of empty platitudes if I didn’t live that out myself.
What’s even more ironic, and even a bit comical, is probably my greatest pet peeve in ministry is when pastors who can’t submit to authority leave a church and start their own church in a rebellious nature.
Doing just that but in a business sense has consumed my thinking recently. Man, I suck. Man, I need to repent. Man, I need grace.
My character was just challenged in a huge way. I see a flawed, dirty guy who needs God’s wisdom in a fresh way. I’m glad I realized it but bummed it took 3 years to figure it out.